I realize that Christmas means a lot of different things to different people, and this year Christmas means something a little bit different to me. Being my first Christmas out of the nest, I feel a little bit awkward, kind of alone. I have all the normal luxuries of my parents house, advent calendar, Christmas music, fireplace DVD ripped to my laptop, I even have the little dollar store tree that I keep up year round for posterity. Despite all this though, it doesn't really feel like Christmas. I'm a little bit unsure as to why this is, is it just a sign that I'm getting older? Am I more jaded than I have been during previous holiday season (I don't think I'm jaded, by the way)? Or is it the being away from my family? In any case I'm planning on spending a good four or five days at Chateau Neville over my break from community college, I don't spend anywhere near the appropriate amount of time at home with my family, and this will be a good make up.
On a related note I've dedicated myself to not shaving until after I return to school in January, seeing as it's winter, I feel that a beard is absolutely necessary for warmth/aesthetics/food storage.
After a comment from a friend of mine on Monday, I've begun to feel like I'm placing myself into a vicious cycle of guilt and worry, which in turn has me feeling guilty and worried, which makes me just feel more...and so on and so on. I've always thought that I was pretty easy going but now that I stand back a few feet and look at myself, I think I may have been wrong all these years.
Anyway, I have to eat lunch and go to work. So I leave you with this a woodcutting of the nativity, woodcuttings are cool as hell.
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